Radically Happy

Sequel to the Sex 30x

War: Aphrodite! How lovely to see you again [kisses her hand].

Love: Ares! Looking as virile as ever [smirks suggestively]

The Earnest Redeemer: Excuse me. Door-Opener (pointing at Love) and Mirror (to War). Would you mind carrying on your illicit affair on your own time? I need you to get down to business.

W. [grinning] But this is our business! As they say, all’s fair in…

E. Nope! Not gonna go there. And anyway… [blushing] well, that’s why I need your help.

L. Ooh, this sound be fun!

E. [grimacing] Maybe for you. I need your help to [takes a deep breath] understand Sex.

W. [claps him on the shoulder] Good man! Now that is a worthy quest.

L. What?! That’s stupid. There is nothing to “understand.” Merely to experience…

E. Okay. That, right there. The disagreement between you. Specifically, there’s two distinct dimensions of Sex I don’t know how to reconcile.

1. Love (indicating Aphrodite) seems inherently symmetric. Sex as mutual pleasure, mutual consent, mutual joy to build the long-term parental partnerships undergirding a family.
2. War (glancing at Ares) is very asymmetric. Sex as conquest. Momentary pleasure and catharsis, for its own sake. His own sake, usually. Keeping score over time.

I look at them. Love seems puzzled, as if unsure what I am asking. War looks confused, as if struggling with an unfamiliar thought. Or emotion.

E. Under patriarchy, this all sort of worked together. Man conquered woman. Man kept woman to create a family. Woman kept the family together while Man went out to conquer more.

Love looks thoughtful. War frowns.

E. But now… nothing makes sense. On the one hand, Man and Woman are considered interchangeable, even mutable. On the other, Man is blamed for abusing and violating Woman.

Love looks sad. War seems… guilty?

E. [gently] I totally get the desire to go back to the way things were. There were many hidden sins and ugly public failure, but at least there was a solid core to react against. Now… [shrugs] it doesn’t matter. We can’t go back. And frankly, I don’t think we should. The only way out is forward.

Love and War both appear… resolute?
Love glances at War.
War nods.

W. Very well. We understand. We will help.

L. But how?

E. Ah… that’s where I was hoping you came in. Do the gods have some secret knowledge about how to reconcile Love and War, just waiting for a desperate mortal to ask?

Love and War look at each other.
Love seems grave.
War widens his eyes as if in surprised approval.
He raises a finger and appears about to speak.

I lean forward, eager to receive my long-awaited answer.

The tension mounts…

Then they both burst into riotous laughter.
Aphrodite literally collapses on the floor giggling.
War roars his guffaws, slapping the table.

I am not amused.
Several angry retorts come to mind.
But I have a sinking feeling that would only feed their amusement.

I suffer in silence until they laugh themselves out.

W. I… I am sorry, old friend. But you seemed so hopeful, and, um, “earnest”..

This sets off another round of titters from Aphrodite. When she recovers, she climbs shakily to her feet and lays a sympathetic hand on my arm.

Even I have a hard time staying angry with that!

L. For sooth, we were not laughing at you so much as ourselves. If we knew the secret of reconciling Love and War, Ares and I would have forsaken Work and Chaos long ago to marry each other.

E. Then… is there no answer to be found?

W. Not in this lower realm, where mortals contend with gods. Yet I have heard of a place where men and women are no longer given in marriage. Perhaps you may find your answer there?

E. Sigh. Looks like another Quest…

To be continued…