Trappist by Ernest N. Prabhakar

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The following poem was inspired by Kenneth, but it isn’t about him. It is about me.

Trappist
6:30 AM, Wednesday, June 21st, 2006
by Ernest N. Prabhakar
For Kenneth
Trapped!

Alone.
Forgotten.

Anger!

Shame.
Despair.

Why?
Why this?
Why me?

Them!

THEY did this to me.
Their lies. Their cruelty.
Their sin.

I didn’t ask for this.
I didn’t cause this to be.
I don’t deserve this.

It’s not my fault.

You!

You who saved others.
Why don’t you help me?
Why don’t You save me?

Can’t You even save Yourself?

Fine.
Be that way.
Let me rot.

I’ll show them.
I’ll show You.

I will be Strong.
I will be Smart.
I will be In Control.

Trust nothing.
Trust no One.

Plan. Plot. Scheme.

My way.

The safe way.
The sure way.
The only way.

Yeah.

Yes!

I’ve done it.
I did it.
Me! Myself! I!

I showed them.
I beat them.
I shamed them.

I’ve proved it.
It’s their fault.
They’re wrong. I’m right.
Victory!

But…

Where did everyone go?

Why am I still alone?

Why am I still…

Trapped!

*

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