Earnest: Yo, Jonah!
Jonah: Yo, Earnest! What brings you all the way back here to Nineveh?
E. Well, it’s kind of embarrassing…
J. Please don’t tell me this is for another whale pun!
E. What? No, nothing like that.
J. Whew. That’s a relief. I can handle anything except another whale pun.
E. Oh, great! I actually wanted to talk to you about bitterness and judgmentalism.
J. …
Continue reading
The written word
Is a fulcrum
For channeling pain
Into meaning
Concluding Mrs. Jesus, #6/7: Wholly Sad, Her Day
I awake… as if from a dream.
I am still myself.
Still married to Jesus.
But my world… my family… is gone.
Did they ever even exist?
This is the truth that sets me free:
I don’t care if you hate me
As long as you know that I love thee
Enough to make me trustworthy
So you dare share the grace I see
And trade self for eternity
[Upon reflection, I fear this is about our church. All of them.]
I am part of an ethnic enclave in a big city.
In many ways, it is exemplary.
The streets are safe.
The children are happy.
The community is unified.
But I discover this comes with a price.
Continue readingContinued from Mrs. Jesus #5/7: Wood Friday
Jesus is gone.
I am alone.
And nothing will ever be okay again.
[In honor of the most overlooked, relevant, and lonely holiday in the Christian calendar]
Continue readingMy wife Sandhya knows where it is.
She tied a yellow string to it.
Well.
She had found it.
But doesn’t rememberer exactly.
Continued from Mrs. Jesus #4/7: Thor’s Hammer Day
Jesus wraps his arms around me and lowers me to the mattress
“I’m scared,” I whisper
“I know,” he murmurs, kissing my brow
“Don’t worry. I will always be with you, even if you can’t see me.”
For the comfort of my body
Jesus placed a small cot by the Tree of Life
I gaze up at it as he fastens two roots to the holes in my wrists
My body is not what I’m worried about
The sensation is what I imagine dialysis fees like
Or a blood transfusion
The lifeblood of the tree fills me
As mine pours into it
As my consciously slowly wanders off
We are on vacation.
I am walking our dogs:
In this reality, we first meet our chocolate lab Frolic at the Zoo.
In this reality, we first meet our chocolate lab Frolic at the Zoo.
Continued from Mrs Jesus #3/7: Wed-ness Day
Friday, I have a date with a tree.
Today I am getting my nails done.
I am terrified.
It’s days like these I ask myself why I ever married Jesus…
It is fun, in our hearts, to play God
To expose our enemies’ fraud
To judge and condemn
Those women and men
Who hide behind saintly facade
Hat tip to Major Lazer
When the world’s full of darkness
Lighten up!
When our souls thirst for justice
Drink the cup!
The truth that we must learn to feel
Is just how deeply Christ is real
This world with its pleasures and pain
Loves to impose on our brain
Illusions of solidity
That overwhelm eternity
Hat tip to Coco
Lord when I fall apart
Re-member me
When pain engulfs my heart
Help me see Thee
For life is still so short
And cursed with ill report
And evil seems to thwart
My noblest effort
Continued from Mrs. Jesus #2/7: Two’s Day Out
I wake up early to make pancakes for the kids.
Jesus shows up to breakfast a little later than usual.
He kisses me on the cheek.
I don’t look him in the eye.
He gives me a knowing look, but doesn’t say anything.
After dropping the kids off, he comes back home instead of heading to work.
He finds me in the backyard, staring at the mountains surrounding our village.
He stands beside me, gently taking my hand but not speaking.
Finally I turn to him.
He takes my other hand as I gaze up through my lashes into his warm brown eyes.
I speak.
“I want to come work with you.”
He smiles.
Though a tear begins to course down his cheek.
And I can feel the tension in his muscles.
To transcend the happiness game
We must learn to confront our shame
Joy becomes pure
When we ensure
We run toward, not from, our true name
[Another attempt to connect with the dissociated parts of myself.]
E. Hey Revenger
R. Hey Ernest
E. So what’s the deal with my man X?
R. You mean the one who’s always blaming certain groups for all the problems in the world?
Continue readingWhen I’m feeling frustrated by you
I’m tempted to just power through
It may be a sin
But that’s how I win:
You do what I want you to do
Yet mercy cries out from the cross
“Don’t gain from another one’s loss!”
As I feel your pain
My loss turns to gain
As Christ demonstrates Who is boss
Radically Happy 
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