Radically Happy

Continued from Geni-All-OG (after the interludes)

Our heroes approach a majestic pink mansion atop a hill.

Tube: (nervously) Are you sure this is a good idea?

Klein Bottle: (sneering) Don’t be so gutless, my plan will work.

Reflection Sphere: (mildly) He can’t stop being gutless any more than you can stop being heartless, until we find the Geni-Us.

Earnest Plane: (earnestly) And that’s why we have to fetch the broomstick from the ‘Nother Witch.

Which Witch: (ominously) My evil sister! A being so twisted and devious, brave men faint in her presence. You are marching to your doom! I will have nothing to do with this. Farewell!

She exits. Tube starts to follow her, but Klein grabs him, and they march towards the front door. Earnest takes a deep breath and rings the doorbell. They tense, anticipating the worst.

The door opens, revealing a beautiful French maid. The tall blonde woman flashes a friendly smile. The four stare at her, dumbstruck.

Maid: Bonjour! How may I help you?

Klein Bottle: Ah… we are from the Magical Item Servicing Team, MIST. It is time for their five-year tune-up.

Maid: (pursing her lips) I’m afraid I don’t know anything about that. Let me get the Secretary.

The door closes. A few seconds later, it opens to reveal an identical woman dressed in a gray flannel suit with her hair in a ponytail.

Secretary: I’m sorry, I don’t see a service call scheduled on our calendar.

Earnest Plane: (hurriedly) This is a special promotion from the manufacturer. They should have called you last week.

Secretary: (shakes her head) Well, they didn’t.

Reflection Sphere: Please, we’ve come such a long way.

Secretary: (tapping her face with a pencil) Well… let me ask the Armorer.

The door closes. A few seconds later, another identical woman opens it, this time dressed in medieval armor.

Armorer: What’s this about a service call?

Earnest Plane: (pompously) The latest research shows that improperly maintained magical items degrade 40% per year.

Tube: And it’s free!

Armorer: (smiling) Why didn’t you say so? Walk this way.

She struts off. The four shapes look at each other, shrug, and follow as best they can. The Armorer leads them through a fancy modern foyer into a basement with stone-block walls lit by torches.

Armorer: The items are in the second door to the right. If you need anything, ask the Blacksmith.

(exits)

Klein Bottle: (rubbing his hands) This is too easy. These air-headed bimbos don’t suspect a thing. Let’s grab that broom and get out of here.

They rush to the room, throw open the door, and hurry inside, only to stop in shock.

This isn’t a storage closet. It is a torture chamber, dimly lit by a furnace in the back, casting flickering shadows across their faces.

An evil cackle sounds. A black-clad figure emerges from the darkness. A woman, identical to the others, but wearing a conical black pointed hat with a wide brim and carrying a broomstick.

Reflection Sphere: The ‘Nother Witch!

Nother Witch: (smiling grimly) Looking for this, boys?

She holds up the broomstick and waves it in a circle. Immediately, the door slams shut, and they hear a heavy bar slam into place… outside.

Tube: Uh-oh.

To be continued…